Author: Jennifer Patchin
God has been teaching me a truth for several years now and I am reminded of it as I am studying the book of Ephesians. The New Testament is full of contrast of life with Christ and life without Christ. There is clearly an old nature and a new nature.(Eph.4:22-24) You were dead in sin, now made alive in Christ.(Eph.2:5) You were once in darkness but now you walk in light.(Eph.5:8) You walked according to the course of the world, now you are of God’s household.(Eph.2:2,19) You were without hope, now you have eternal hope in Christ Jesus.(Eph.2:12)
Ephesians 4:22-24 (NLT)
“Throw off your old evil nature and your former way of life, which is rotten through and through, full of lust and deception. Instead, there must be a spiritual renewal of your thoughts and attitudes. You must display a new nature because you are a new person created in God’s likeness-righteous, holy, and true.”
The problem is that many of us who have come to know Jesus as our savior and made him Lord of our life still struggle with living in that old nature. Friends, this should not be! But I struggle too. I have found that the key is not just putting off the old nature or trying to empty myself of familiar sins, but there is a necessary action step of replacement.
I for many years have struggled with my tongue. I struggle with being harsh and critical to my family. I have memorized many verses about the tongue and posted countless scriptures on my bathroom mirror and kitchen cupboards to remind me of what God says should come out of my mouth. These things help but and I would encourage others to do the same but to be honest the struggle remains the same. God has shown me that the problem is that I am emptying my mouth of the harsh, critical words and trying to stay silent. The familiar saying, “if you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all”. But the Bible is clear that we need to replace and not just empty. I need to put on the opposite- sweet speech!
“A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.” Proverbs 15:1 “Pleasant words are a honeycomb, sweet to the soul and healing to the bones.” Proverbs 16:24
I need to practice saying words that are sweet and encouraging. I need to not only empty myself of my old nature but I need to put on the new nature. That is possible through the power of the Holy Spirit working in me and walking in obedience to what God requires of me. It takes practice. Sweet words like honey are not going to just gush out of my mouth because that is not natural for me. I have to set out to say positive things, to compliment, to make sure that I encouraged just as much if not more than I instructed. I need to write notes and express love with words. It takes work and a focus on training myself to live in my new nature.
So as purposeful parents we need to be teaching these truths to our children. I need to not just address the negative behavior or attitude of my children, but I need to help them see what God’s word says about that behavior or attitude and what God says to replace it with. If my child is struggling with having an ungrateful spirit I need to help him see that he needs to put on a thankful heart. When we see this attitude we address it as sin and point out what God’s word says but then we focus on the action, the new nature. We ask them to give an account of all they have to be thankful for in the day. Sometimes this could even be in writing or to keep an ongoing list of what they are thankful for.
Maybe my child is struggling with fear or worry. Then the focus becomes on God’s promises and that God is trustworthy. I need to help my child focus on verses that remind them of God’s presence and his purpose. Philippians 4:6 “Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.”
Often the things that I need to address with my children are the way they treat one another or their attitudes. A key verse we have memorized is Colossians 3:12,13 “As God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another.” There is a literal picture here of putting on these characteristics like clothing. Here is your action step. When we first memorized this verse, with each trait we pretended to put it on like a shirt or pants until we were fully dressed with the things that God says to put on. If you read the verses prior it lists all the things we are to put off. Another passage that addresses what we should put on in this manner is Ephesians 6:13-17 putting on the armor of God.
There are many scriptures that contrast old nature and new nature. A key verse we are focusing on with our children currently is Philippians 4:8 “Whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable- if anything is excellent or praiseworthy think about such things.” It starts in the mind, what we think about will effect how we act or what we believe.
I would encourage you to prayerfully identify first in yourself and then in your children an area of sin that is hard to overcome. Then go to God’s word for wisdom and instruction to identify what does the new nature look like and what is the action step. Ask God to show you clearly in his word what tools he has given you to overcome this area of sin and then practice my friends at living in your new nature. God has given us everything we need to live for Him.
Next Week’s Author: Liz
Wonderful words of wisdom, Jennifer! I plan on being more conscious of trying to clothe myself with the things of the Spirit and encouraging my children to do the same! Thank you so much for sharing your heart and encourging us to replace the old with the new!