Am I Doing Enough?

Jennifer Patchin has been married to her wonderful husband Kelly for 17 years. Kelly is the Pastor of New Harbor Community Church in Benicia, California. They have 4 wonderful children. Victoria is almost 16, Blake is 9, Isabel is almost 7 and Micah is almost 5. Jennifer has the privilege of being a full time stay at home mom and is starting the adventure of home schooling her 3 older children. She has a heart to encourage women as mothers and wives and especially in their relationship with God. She also has a burden for children with special needs and the special needs of their families.

I am always challenged by Deuteronomy 6:5-9:
“Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates.”

I love the Lord and desire above all else that my children will love Him with all of their hearts. Yet I am constantly questioning whether I am doing enough. Or will all the times that I blow it outweigh the times that I am guiding and training them? I know that God looks at the heart and that is the battlefield that I need to be on, reaching my children’s hearts for the Lord. But how? When I look at the above verses it sounds so straight forward and easy and yet we all know that to keep God the focus in all that we do from the time we wake up to the time we go to bed can be very challenging. Then to communicate that to our children can be even harder. So with a little reservation that this may seem too basic or redundant I wanted to start a list of some things that we can do to help our children grow spiritually.

*Talk to your children about God!
When they are young take the opportunity to point out God’s creation and his majesty
through it.
Talk about how much God loves them and that he sent his son to die for them. God’s
love is unconditional.
Share with your children what God is teaching you or lessons you have learned about
God.
Ask your children what they are learning at church or what they think about God.
Learn to filter everything through spiritual eyes and help your children do the same.
God’s ways are not the same as our ways, but His ways are always best.

*Pray with and for your children!
Pray throughout the day, not just meals and bed time (although that is a good place to
start if you are not in the habit).
Pray when your child is struggling with something. Our children need to learn that they
cannot be good or overcome obstacles in their own strength. They need Jesus.
Pray on your way to school for their day, teachers, attitude, friends, and enemies.
Pray when you see a car accident, fire, or when you run in to someone having a bad day.
Praise God together when your child is doing well (having a good attitude, being kind,
helpful, etc.)
Teach your children to be aware of the needs of others and to pray for them.

Stormie Omartian says in her book, The Power of the Praying Parent
“When we show them that walking with God brings joy and fulfillment, not boredom and restriction, when we pray with and for them about everything, then our children will develop a hunger for the things of God. They will long for His ways, His Word and His presence.”

*Read God’s Word!
If your children are young read the Bible to them. Commit to read it every day.
If your children are old enough to read, encourage them to read the bible on their own
every day.
To teach your children the discipline of reading God’s Word every day will
become a habit as they grow. I watch my teenage daughter get up almost every
morning and spend time with God in prayer and bible study. Yes, we trained her to do
that when she was young and now she does it on her own because she understands her
need to be with Jesus.
A friend was just telling me an analogy that she was thinking about in regards to this. She shared that as far back as she can remember it was ingrained in her to wear her seat belt. She understood all the benefits of wearing her seat belt and the dangers of not. Now as an adult she can hardly even start the car without making sure her seat belt is fastened. Because she has been doing it her whole life it is a discipline. If this same emphasis had been put on reading her Bible and spending time with God every day, then these things might be easier disciplines for her today.
For young children a Children’s Story Bible is a good way to teach the stories of the Bible at their level.
There are also many devotional books for children that are short and simple. When they are young these are helpful to teach a biblical lesson that they can understand.

*Be an example!
We have all heard many times, “It in not what you say, it is what you do?”
We need to model with our lives a love for God and His word and His ways. That is the most effective way to reach the heart of our children.
Unfortunately many of the things that my children struggle with are the same things that I struggle with. They have learned my bad habits and sinful ways.
I pray they are also learning the positive things that I have to offer.
Children need for us to show them how to live.
It is not enough to say it, we have to do it.
We can’t just say “be kind to your sister” if we are not modeling kindness.
Check yourself and make sure that you are being the example that you want your children to follow.
Make sure that you are spending time before the throne of your Heavenly Father. He is the one that will give you strength and wisdom. As you love Him more and follow His ways it will pour out into your children.