Name: Melanie
Email:
Bio: Devoted wife to my hard-working, handsome, all-around great husband, Tyler. Loving mother to my two precious children, Nathan (loves legos, reading, learning and playing with friends) and Rachel (loves almost all she tries, particularly dance and music). Passionate about many things including my faith, family, parenting, and being all that God desires for us. Lover of wisdom.
Posts by Passionate Purposeful Parenting:
- About 18 years ago someone in my church, after speaking with the elders and seeking wisdom as whether or not she should approach me, told me that God had told her that I was going to be a pastor someday. Since I had studied to be an elementary school teacher what immediately came to mind was a children’s pastor. Two years later my pastor defined the word “pastor” as a “shepherd.” I believe shepherding is one of my top gifts!
- Before I knew anything about the possible DCM position, God laid on my heart to start a study for mothers with children 9 years and younger. (this is our seventh week meeting) The moms in this study are the moms of many of the children who will be in the children’s ministry!
Seek, Pray, Turn Over, Trust and See Him Work!
October 24th, 2012
Author: Melanie Robbins
Have you ever had a time in your life where you clearly see God’s hand – see how He has been working and know with certainty where He is leading you and your family? This is such a time in my life!
Last time I wrote about a big change in our family – Nathan no longer being homeschooled, but attending North Creek Academy. In the past couple of months there has been a couple more. BOTH children are now attending the Christian school! We started out the school year with one and now they both are going – very different from what we thought was going to happen this year, BUT God clearly opened a big door and I knew without a doubt where He was leading – proving that with God anything and everything is possible! (Later in the post I share HOW He made it possible)
I grew up in Christian schools. I loved the school I went to and loved the school environment. Before we moved 11 years ago my husband indicated that although he went to a Catholic school (chosen
by his parents solely because of better academics) he wasn’t planning on sending our children to a private school. He didn’t like going to a school that was not near his neighborhood. The only way he
felt that he would support the idea would be IF the school was close OR it didn’t cost anything (charter school). If both factors were there– cost and distance– our kids would not be attending. We hadn’t talked about this before we married. Honestly, it was really hard to hear. I knew I needed to submit to my husband in this area, but it wasn’t going to be easy.
When the kids were young, he threw out the idea of homeschooling. I balked at that idea – I had seen it done poorly and didn’t feel that I “had what it took” to do it. As you know, one should never say “never.” I had the privilege of homeschooling my children for three precious years. During those years, we spent wonderful quality time together, focusing on their heart, character, and faith. We greatly enjoyed the freedom and flexibility that came with HS and loved being able to challenge them and focus more on their interests. It reached a point though where I felt like I couldn’t provide my son with what he needed –both academically and socially. God amazingly changed my husband’s mind and heart about sending him to a Christian school. Previous post shares more on
this: http://www.purposeful-parenting.com/2012/06/06/making-important-impactful-decisions-regarding-your-children/
My dear daughter, although she enjoyed homeschooling, has missed the school environment. She is my social butterfly and thrives in those types of settings. My husband and I didn’t plan on her attending this year. Financially it was not something we felt we could do. We told her one more year and then I would get a part-time job so that she could attend.
BUT God had another plan! My pastor’s wife and friend asked me to pray about the part-time director of children’s ministry position that was about to be approved by our church. Once the part-time paid position was approved, I began praying about it and asked her and my husband to do the same. The night it was approved I woke up at 3 a.m. and thought and prayed about it for an hour and a half, seeking what God would want. The more I thought about the position the more I felt like it was the perfect match, BUT after an hour and a half of talking to God, I felt what God had laid on my heart was a reminder of priorities – Family, Church and then my desire for the job. Although Rachel wanted to go to school, she didn’t think it would be good to start at the Christian after the school year had already had started. My commitment and priority was to my daughter. Even though Jen had mentioned that maybe the church (if they were interested in me for the position) could wait until near the end of the school year before I started, I knew that our church needed someone as soon as possible. It was hard, but I let go of the job, sacrificed it, knowing that what was most important was maintaining the right priorities. Once I did that, showed that my desire was to please the Lord and do His will, doors started opening.
During the summer, I had connected with a 5th grade teacher at North Creek. I had hoped to find out from him what he was doing with his 5th grade class so that I could do similar things with Rachel with the hope of preparing her as best as I could for 6th grade at the school. He went above and beyond in what he shared with me and even offered to meet with me after Labor Day (the meeting was
planned BEFORE the DCM position was mentioned at church). When I met with him, my only intention was learning from him what he was doing with his class and getting ideas to use with Rachel. I fell in love with him as a teacher – his love for his students and profession was very apparent. He was confident, passionate, and excited about what he was doing with his class. I started thinking how much Rachel would benefit if she could be in his class. At the end of our time together, I felt prompted to ask him what he thought about a student joining his class at the point in the year (4 weeks after school started). He was very open to the idea and even invited Rachel to come visit his class for a day. Rachel did. Long story short…. She loved it, the teacher and fellow students loved it! She was excited and confident that she could join and fit right in with everyone. Wow! First priority was met! Now I was able to meet the second priority – being available for the church as soon as they needed me! My husband and I took a step of faith – I didn’t have the job yet, but felt confident that God’s hand was in the midst of all of this. Rachel joined the class a couple days later. I’ve had my interview with the Pastor and Elders; they wholeheartedly approved and are recommending me this Sunday to my church for the Director of Children’s Ministry position.
This is just a glimpse into all that has happened these past couple of months. I’m so humbled and blown away by how I’ve seen God work and how much I’ve seen His love for me and my family! He has done what I never thought could happen— both of my children are attending an incredible Christian school AND I have an opportunity to serve Him and others in an area that has been my heart’s passion and desire for a long time – one reason why I started Passionate Purposeful Parenting!! Parents — Seek Him, Pray your desires, Turn it over, Trust Him, and See Him work!
Couple other related “God things”:
Ephesians 3:20 “Now to Him who is able to do far more abundantly than all that we ask or think, according to the power at work within us.”
Next Week’s Author: Kim Ashbaugh
Making Important, Impactful Decisions Regarding Your Children
June 6th, 2012
Author: Melanie Robbins
We made a big decision a few months ago, one which will have a significant impact on our family. I will not be homeschooling my son Nathan next year. Talk about one of the most important decisions we’ve had to make as parents!
Parenting requires an incredible amount of wisdom. We are constantly making decisions regarding our children – some are minor and some are major. Some can have long-lasting effects. I am so thankful I am not alone in my parenting. Besides my husband, I have my heavenly Father, who loves my children even more than I do. I’m thankful that he is omniscient {all-knowing}, omnipresent, and omnipotent {all-powerful}. I’m thankful, too, that He can and will do all that He promises in His word. I cling to those promises! One of my favorites is His promise to give wisdom to those who ask. {James 1:5}
For the past three years, I have homeschooled both of my children. It was a decision made after much prayer and discussion with my husband. When we made it, we had peace, believing it was what would be best for them and our family. Homeschooling has been such a tremendous blessing! The kids and I have enjoyed and benefitted from it greatly. It has afforded us much freedom and flexibility. I have learned a lot about them and myself as a result. We have all grown a tremendous amount in our faith and relationship with God. It has not been without its challenges and difficulties, however. Teaching two different grades each year to two different learners who have unique learning styles has been overwhelming. It has been more than a full-time job and trying to keep up with it as well as my other responsibilities/roles – wife, homemaker, family member, church member, friend, etc. has, at times, been daunting. Whatever I do, I like to do it with excellence and I felt like with all that I had on my plate I wasn’t able to do anything well. That feeling and the constant feeling of being overwhelmed brought out things in me that I didn’t know were there. I struggled with anger and impatience – characteristics that I hadn’t seen manifested in me before.
In the midst of all of this, I was also beginning to realize that I wasn’t equipped to provide my son with all that he needed. He has been given a gift – he is bright and has a thriving intellectual curiosity which I couldn’t satiate. It was hard as his teacher to not be able to answer his numerous questions {we did use Google 
} and to challenge him in ways I knew he should be challenged.
Socially, too, I couldn’t provide the environment he needed. He hasn’t cared for team sports and has always been more of a homebody, preferring to spend time with 1 or 2 friends which he has known for many years. My husband and I were starting to feel that we needed to help him to become more comfortable socially and help him to develop needed social skills by having him be exposed to different types of social environments. With homeschooling we had not been able to consistently provide him with those types of situations.
While all of this was going on, I was praying about schooling and not feeling peaceful about continuing to homeschool Nathan next year. Unfortunately, I wasn’t feeling good about the other option – sending him to the public middle school in town. Going from homeschooling to a large, public school given his personality etc., did not seem like it would be best for him. More importantly, developing his heart, character, and faith are what is most important to me and I knew that by sending him there that during the hours of school those things would not be actively and intentionally developed. I knew, too, that my husband hadn’t wanted to pay for schooling and/or have our children not go to school in town. I felt this tremendous burden. I wasn’t sure what to do. I knew God knew me, my son, and the situation and what would be best, though. I continued to pray and give it over to God, praying for wisdom and guidance. In sharing with my mother-in-law how I was feeling about Nathan etc. she offered to possibly help pay for private schooling for him. My mother then also offered to contribute. When I mentioned that to my husband and once again shared my heart about all that I felt, I saw God work! My husband’s mind changed. He became open to the idea of paying for schooling and to him going to school out of town! Wow! Something I never felt would happen, happened! God clearly opened doors and answered my prayers. I cannot describe the peace and burden lifted when my husband and I made the final decision to have Nathan go to a Christian school next year.
Every child is different. Every parent, family and situation is different. Although I know all the benefits of homeschooling {which are many} and why it seemed like the best option, I wrestled, prayed and sought what was best for my son and our family and believe God clearly gave us the wisdom and guidance we needed. Next year Nathan will be going to a Christian school and I will be homeschooling our daughter.
My reason in writing this is to hopefully be an encouragement to you. God gave you your children for a reason. You are the best possible parent for them. There are many decisions you need to make for your children and family. Don’t look at what others are doing or not doing in order to find your answers. Remember that each child, family situation etc. is different. God loves you and knows what is best. Look to God for wisdom, guidance and direction and trust that He will give it to you.
“Trust in the Lord with all your heart, And lean not on your own understanding, but in all your ways acknowledge Him and He will make your paths straight.” Prov. 3: 5-6
Next Week’s Author: Kim Ashbaugh
One of the Greatest Gifts You Can Give Your Children
September 21st, 2011
“I’ll write it for you,” I quietly said to my husband as he was sharing how stressed he was and what he still had to do. That is why I am the author today. It’s my husband’s turn, actually. I’m trying to love my husband the best way I know how. Work has been extremely busy and stressful (the most it has been in the past 15 years of marriage). How can I love him best? I know his” love language” – Acts of Service. Although I am really busy, have a lot going on, and it is last minute (we were talking today), I offered to write the post. He has a lot on his mind and plate and by offering to take something off his plate, I am demonstrating my love for him.
A while back I wrote a post entitled “Who is Number One?” I could have entitled this one “Who is Number Two?” Is it your children or your spouse? Your spouse should be your number one priority next to God. One of the best gifts you can give your children is a healthy marriage.
We all know that marriage takes work and sacrifice. Especially now with how busy households are – two parents working, more homework and time-consuming activities it can be quite challenging. More seems to be demanded of the family, yet there is still the same amount of time in a day. Do you ever find yourself thinking I’ve done this and that so it’s his/her turn, he/she should be doing this? A wise pastor once told me that marriage is not 50/50; it requires 100 percent from both spouses. If you’re keeping track and counting how much your spouse has done, then you’re allowing resentment to enter into your marriage.
Love is not just an emotion – it’s an action. Are you patient, kind, not self-seeking, and not easily angered with your spouse? (1 Cor. 13: 4-8)
How can I practically and realistically do this, you ask? A few suggestions…….
* Ask God for help in making your spouse a priority and in loving him/her the way He wants you to. Know the roles and responsibilities God has created for you as husband/wife.
* I am a big proponent of prayer and accountability partners. Ask someone to pray for you and hold you accountable.
* Ask your spouse how you can be praying for him/her and pray daily for them and for yourself. Here’s a great resource for praying for your spouse.
* Know the love language (Five Love Languages: Quality Time, Words of Affirmation, Acts of Service, Physical Touch, Gifts) of your spouse and seek to love him in the way that he/she desires to be loved. Try to include your children in loving their mother/father in this way.
* Most importantly – spend time with your Lord and Savior — continue to grow in your knowledge and love for Him and as you do, He will continue to transform you in His image and help you to be the spouse He wants you to be.
By the way, even if you are no longer with the father/mother of your children, it is important to maintain respect toward that person as their father/mother. Your children will follow your lead. How you are toward them will also affect your children’s relationship with their Heavenly Father. Remember, too, that God loves you and is with you to help you parent your children.
I”m praying for all of you who are reading this that you will see the truth and importance of making your spouse number two and that as you seek to do so, you and your family will be encouraged and blessed.
How do YOU make your spouse a priority and show love to him/her?
P.S. There is so much more on this topic, you can read my previous posts (starting with this one) in the “relationship with spouse” category or if anyone would like to “discuss” it further with me, please feel free to contact me at melanie@purposeful-parenting.com
Who is Number One?
April 27th, 2011
They say there is nothing like a mother’s love. I think most mothers can relate with this saying.
Extravagant love – the love I have for my children. I would do and/or sacrifice most anything for my children. I don’t believe that there is anything inherently wrong with this, but it can lead to something that should not happen — having my children come before my relationship with God.
I must confess that I feel like I have made my children an idol sometimes. So much of my life, it seems, now revolves around them, especially now that I am homeschooling. Anyone who knows me and/or reads my website/blog knows that I am passionate about parenting.
Children truly are a gift from God. (Psalm 127: 3) He entrusted them to me to raise the way He would want them to be raised. I am to love, provide for, and train them up in the way that they should go, yes, but not put them before God.
We are created to love God first and foremost with all our heart, soul, mind and strength – this is the first and greatest commandment. The second greatest commandment is to love others. (Matthew 22: 37-40) When I reflect on where my time, energy, thought, and commitment are spent, I know that I switch those commandments around.
I can get so consumed with being a good mother that I lose sight of what is most important and why I am here. My pastor shared this with us this Sunday: “Do not love ____________ (fill in the blank) more than Christ because Christ is our life!”
I’ve been entrusted with two tremendous blessings. I am to give thanks and cherish them and seek what God would want for them, but I am to do so in light of God’s Kingdom. I need to, with God’s help, seek to always have a heavenly focus and not an earthly one. (Colossians 3:2)
I know that I need to ask myself what are my heart intentions behind what I am doing and/or the decisions I am making. Am I living to please God or please man? (Galatians 1:10)
Actually, there IS something even greater than a mother’s love — it’s the love our Heavenly Father has for us and for our children. He says in John 15:13, “Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends.” He models for us the way to love. Just a few days ago, we commemorated the incredible way He showed His love for us, sacrificing His own Son on our behalf.
The wonderful truth, dear fellow parents: When we love and put Him first, we will be better able to love and parent our children and our homes will be both happier and more purposeful!
Next Week’s Author: Scott Turansky
Children are a Gift from God
January 5th, 2011
Author: Melanie Robbins
Parenting Expert? That is far from me! Why then did I create Passionate Purposeful Parenting and why am I leading a parenting workshop in a couple of weeks? I’m just a fellow mom who is passionate about parenting, loves being a mother, and truly believes that we as moms can learn from and encourage each other in parenting.
I thought I would share with you a little (there is so much more) of what I’m going to share in a couple of weeks at the workshop.
Children are a Gift from God. (Psalm 127:3) I know that all of you who are reading this would agree with me. I believe that you cherish your children and desire to be the best mom that you can be. So what do we do as parents with this precious gift from God?
* G ive them back to God.
He is their primary parent. Your children are children of God first.
We need to trust in God’s love for your child. No one loves your child more than He. He desires the best for them and has a good purpose and plan in store (Jer. 29:11).
By giving them back to Him, you acknowledge this and it will help to bring you confidence, comfort, and peace. It will help you to not worry, but to trust.
He knew what He was doing when He entrusted you with your children.
* I dentify your purpose in parenting.
Why are you their parent? What is your purpose as the parent of your children? Our purpose as His children: We are all created by God for God (Isaiah 43:7)
What are the two primary commandments God gives us — to Love Him with all our heart, soul, and mind and to Love Others as ourselves — thereby bringing glory to Him. (Matthew 22: 37-40)
Our purpose as parents, then, is to guide our children to know and love Him. Our goal would be to guide them and that God would ultimately lead them.
* F oster your relationship with the Father and with their father.
In order to be the parent both you and God desire you to be, you need to be connected with the Father. The biggest influence on our children’s lives is our example and so we need to “walk our talk.”
How is your relationship with God? Are you spending time with and abiding in Him? Are you learning and growing in your faith? Is your heart daily connecting with God and His Word?
How is your relationship with your children’s father? This, too, is very important when raising children. Your husband, the children’s father, should still be your number one priority next to God. He needs to know and the children need to know that he is.
* T rain them up in the way that they should go.
What is “the way that they should go”? Refer back to our purpose in parenting – guiding them to Love God and to Love Others.
In order for this to occur, they need to know God and His Word. The Bible tells us to “Impress them (His commands/Word) on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. 8Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. 9Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates.” Deut. 6: 7-9.
Laura shared some other wonderful suggestions in her “Saturation” post a few weeks ago.
If they truly know and love God, they will desire to obey Him. The primary commandment for children to know to start with is “Children obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. Honor your father and your mother.”Ephesians 6: 1-2
In the next post I write I’ll share some more ideas about training up children. There are a number of fabulous resources I have found helpful.
Cherishing with you the gifts God has given us!
Next Week’s Author: Dr. Scott Turansky
Seeking Assistance
September 1st, 2010
Author: Melanie Robbins
Listen to advice and accept instruction, and in the end you will be wise. Proverbs 19:20
I don’t know what to do or say. I’ve found myself thinking that more often as my children have gotten older. When my children were younger, parenting came a little more naturally to me I guess. I was fortunate in that neither of my children had major discipline issues. I don’t remember going through terrible twos or having temper tantrum struggles. Meeting their physical needs was tiring, but didn’t require much thought. Loving and affirming them was something that I loved and was easy for me. Now that they are older, their strong-willed, independent personalities are showing themselves more. My children who use to be best friends that wanted to marry each other someday are having more sibling issues. The values and principles that I want to instill in them are very clear to me, but how to do that isn’t always as clear. I desire to reach their hearts and to help them to love God and love others, but I don’t always know the best way to do it. Parenting is hard work. I can’t do it all on my own.
One thing that has helped me is seeking assistance. I have always been a lover of wisdom. The Bible has been my primary source. Reading God’s word and praying for wisdom (James 1:5) provides me with guidance. I also seek advice and counsel from others. When I first had children, I remember talking to moms who had older children asking them to share any words of wisdom they could regarding parenting. I truly believe that we can learn and grow from fellow parents. Another valuable resource is godly parenting experts. Just recently I read a couple fantastic parenting books which have been a tremendous help. Parenting is Heart Work and Say Goodbye to Whining, Complaining and Bad Attitudes… in you and your kids! written by Dr. Scott Turansky and Joanne Miller are unique from other parenting books I’ve read in that they not only give biblical principles and guidelines, but many practical tips and tools to help families as well.
Passionate Purposeful Parenting is now a resource for me as well. It was originally created to encourage and help equip parents of young children. I created it with the intent to share with mothers of young children what I had learned and experienced with my children as well as resources I had found that I thought would be helpful. It has grown and changed. We now have fifteen regular godly contributing authors in different seasons of life with varied backgrounds and experiences. I learn and am encouraged by every post I read. Through the research I have done for PPP, I have discovered other resources that have been helpful for me. The past couple of weeks I have been in contact with some parenting specialists who have been an encouragement to me and who have agreed to contribute to PPP (Dr. Scott Turansky and Joanne Miller – cofounders of The National Center for Biblical Parenting and Effective Parenting; Laura Kuehn – Licensed Clinical Social Worker and founder of Cornerstones for Parents, and Holly Lien – Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist)
I know that there will always be times where I’m not sure what is the best thing to do or to say to my children, but I am so thankful that there are resources I can turn to for help. It is an honor and privilege to be on this parenting journey with you. I will continue to be transparent with you – sharing both my struggles and joys. As I find helpful tools, I will share them with you as well. It is my prayer that you will find Passionate Purposeful Parenting a helpful resource to you as you parent your children.
Next Week’s Author: Scott Turansky
Positive Influences
June 18th, 2010
It takes a village to raise a child. I remember when Hilary Clinton brought this old African proverb into light. It was before I had any children of my own and, to be honest, I didn’t really think about it much or take the time to fully know or understand what she meant by it. Now that I have children I do value having help from others to raise my children. My definition of “raising” may be a little different than what she meant when she used it. As my children are getting older, I am now really desiring and appreciating other positive influences in their lives. I am very grateful for those who are helping me to train Nathan and Rachel up in the way they should go.
For the past eleven years, I have been either a Sunday School teacher and/or a youth volunteer. I have had an opportunity to invest in these young people’s lives. As my children have grown, I’ve realized what an impact teachers and youth leaders can have on them. When I was growing up, I don’t remember having adults other than family who invested time in me. A number of times I have thought of what it would have been like if I had had others who modeled and taught me what it means to be a follower of Jesus.
When I am spending time with children/teens, I try to be a godly example. What I share with them is often what their parents might, but it’s coming from someone other than their parents. I may say it a little differently or how I say it might resonate a little more clearly. I love these children and teens not because I have to as their parents, but because I want to. I don’t have any agenda or ulterior motive.
I feel so fortunate that my children have a number of positive adult influences in their lives. They spend time with their grandmas at least two times a month. Although we don’t share the same faith, we share similar values. I so appreciate their influence in their lives. My dear friend is their history teacher and the mother of their best friends. She is with them often and we are on the same page in about every area of parenting. Through our Sunday School, AWANA program, family and friends they have several more godly adults who through their example and teaching are helping me raise Nathan and Rachel.
It means so much to me when others take an interest in, pray for, or invest in my children. I am tremendously grateful for their example and for them reinforcing the same values we try to instill in them. When I started PPP, my heart was to help encourage and equip parents of young children. I truly believe that as parents we’re all in this together. We share in common our love for our children and our desire to raise and train them up the best way that we can. We can learn and grow from sharing our experiences, struggles, and triumphs.
Next Week’s Author: Jaime DeCarlo
Making Prayer a Priority
March 31st, 2010
God answered my son’s prayer for a $85 dollar Lego set with a YES. He found 70 dollars on the ground and with that and what he had in spending and recycling money he was within one dollar of the amount he needed. God showed Nathan that He definitely cares about him (my son is a thinker, he asks questions and wants proof), that He listens, and that He answers prayer. My son saw that prayer is powerful. My son prayed, believing that God would answer that prayer; he would check the mailbox looking for a check every day. He didn’t doubt that God could and would answer his prayer. (Side note: If you read last week’s post, you will recall that my husband indicated that he and our son are similar. I truly believe that God used the situation and specific answer to prayer that my husband referred to for my husband’s benefit, for him to see how important and necessary his prayers are for our family.
)18And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the saints.” Ephesians 6:18
I am a big believer in the importance and power of prayer. As a result I try and pray often with and for my children. I thought I would share some of what we do to make prayer a priority.
We pray with them throughout the day. We pray at meals and at bedtime but also sometimes in the morning when they first wake up. We pray before we start school. Before we leave on a trip, there are prayers lifted up for safety, and when we arrive and/or return we try to say a prayer of thanks. When they or others have a need or are struggling, we try and stop and pray. For example if they are having a difficult day and are arguing with each other, I will sit them both down and stop and pray. I will also say a prayer with them when mom is having a difficult day. If something good happens or we hear of an answer to prayer, we try to acknowledge and give God thanks.
We pray for different things each day. On Mondays we pray for our church and our pastor and his family. On Tuesdays we pray for those we are supporting and/or sponsoring. On Wednesday we pray for the World (leaders, sick, lonely, hurting), On Thursday we pray for Extended Family. On Friday we pray for our Friends and the Unsaved People.
We have them listen to others praying out loud. They hear us pray out loud often, but we also have taken them to our church’s monthly Evening of Prayer. There they hear others pray for our church and others in need. My husband took them one month when I was gone and they asked if they could go again the next time there was Evening of Prayer.
I pray for their heart and character and ask others to as well. On the PPP website is a calendar listing different godly attributes for each day. I have prayed that calendar and asked others to join me in praying those things for my children.
We use ACTS to remember to not just ask for things. A – Adoration, C – Confession, T – Thanksgiving, S – Supplication
I remind them that prayer is a form of worship. I like how Charles Stanley puts it, “Intercession means that we rouse ourselves up to get in the mind of Christ about the one for whom we are praying”
It is my hope and prayer that my children will truly see and believe in the importance of prayer. My desire is that prayer will be a vital part of their personal faith and walk with God. I was encouraged the other day when my daughter asked if I could join her in praying that she would have a good day and have self-control. She knew it might be a difficult day for her because she hadn’t gotten much sleep and it was going to be a very busy day. I bet you can guess what my answer was.
Next week’s Author: Jeannine Cook
Who am I?
January 13th, 2010
Author: Melanie Robbins
I am struggling as a parent right now. I knew it was my turn to write for PPP. With all that is going on I thought – ‘who am I to share anything to try to encourage or help equip?’ I didn’t know what I had to share so I thought I would share with you my heart and my struggles.
Parenting has definitely gotten a lot harder for me as the kids have gotten older. When they were younger it was more physically demanding with meeting their needs: feeding, changing their diapers, bathing etc., but now it is much more psychologically demanding. It came more naturally for me to love, nurture and care for their physical needs than it is now to make countless decisions regarding their training and disciplining (and now education) throughout the day.
My heart’s true desire is to “train them up in the way they should go,” and I know the principles behind this, but HOW to go about it is not as clear. My two children are different, they have different struggles and they respond differently. When they are not obeying, showing respect, or being kind with their words, how should I respond? What are the words or actions I should take? What if they continued to struggle with the same thing? How do I not just deal with their behavior, but reach their heart? When my children are not getting along, I need patience, wisdom and discernment when I respond.
Overall I have truly enjoyed and feel we have benefited as a family from homeschooling, but this past week has been difficult. I work hard to prepare for school and when my children question or argue or complain or show disrespect, I am discouraged and disheartened. When you add them not getting along on top of that, I have felt at my wit’s end. I have to keep in mind that we were just coming back from 2 weeks of vacation and Daddy was away on business, but I confess that I started doubting this week. I started wondering whether or not I could do a good job of parenting and teaching them. I questioned the job I had done thus far in training them and reaching their heart. I also started seeing more and more things in myself that needed changing.
As their psychological and emotional needs have increased and as my children have started acting up more, I have struggled more with being harsh and getting angry. I get exasperated and I believe that my children do as well. I worry how my sin will impact them. I know that I need to model for them what I want for them, what God desires for them. I want to be able to be patient, respond calmly and use wisdom no matter what the situation – it just doesn’t always happen. I am pleading and asking God to help me.
I continue to ask His forgiveness and ask for help and trust in these promises to name a few:
“My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness. Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.” (2 Cor. 12:9)
“I can do everything through him who gives me strength.” (Philippians 4:13)
“Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight.” (Prov. 3:5-6)
“If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him.” (James 1:5)
“being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.” (Phil. 1:6)
Even though I am struggling as a parent, I know that God always loves me and my children and that He desires the best for us. Knowing this gives me comfort and confidence as I continue to strive with His help to be the parent He desires me to be.
Why I Am Loving Homeschooling
September 16th, 2009
This is our second week and I can honestly say that I love homeschooling my two children. I thought I would share with you a glimpse into what homeschooling has been like and why I am really enjoying it.
I have so much more quality time with my children to train and enjoy them. In the mornings we don’t feel rushed AND we are having devotional time (currently we are studying the 10 commandments) and praying for others. We tried to do this when we attended public school last year, but it always seemed rushed if and when we did do it. Our mission as a family is to love God and love others. Homeschooling has given us the opportunity to do both better. One benefit has been that we are spending more time with God individually and as a family, integrating Him into every pa
rt of our day (schooling included). Our theme verse for school this year is Colossians 3; 23-24. “Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for men, since you know that you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward. It is the Lord Christ you are serving.” Our first class rule is to do our best for the Lord. In Science this year we are using “Considering God’s Creation” curriculum. The whole year we will be studying different parts of God’s creation.
As a family, we also feel it is important to love others. With homeschooling comes more flexibility, time and freedom during your week. We were able to bake brownies and give cards to our neighbors this past week and we’ve written letters to Grandparents as well. These were things we wanted to do before, but with school, homework, and activities, it was sometimes challenging to find the time. There will be many more opportunities to love and serve others and, because we can be very efficient with our time during the school days, we have time during the week to reach out to others.
A few other reasons I enjoy homeschooling:
*They spend time with other adults who will influence their lives in a positive way (Daddy is teaching them technology, Grandma is teaching art and music, my dear friend is teaching them Social Studies etc.)
* Being the one who is teaching my children, I can challenge them and tailor school more to their interests and learning styles as well as provide immediate feedback. I also have control over what is taught.
* I love the extra time down time I have with the kids — reading, talking etc.
Don’t get me wrong, there are some downsides to homeschooling such as trying to juggle being their full-time teacher, mom, and the homemaker etc. Most days I am working from the time I get up to the time I go to bed (which is later now 10:30 or 11:00 compared to 9:30 or 10 before homeschooling). I miss the students, teachers and parents at the school. Although my kids have not said anything about missing school yet, I know they miss their friends. I have less time and energy to do things outside of the school day, such as get together with friends, work on PPP , etc.
In my opinion, though, homeschooling is definitely worth it. I know there will be times where I may not feel this way, but I am confident that I am doing what God would want me to do for my children. I know, too, that we are all benefiting as a result of our decision to home school.